“Relax and enjoy this thing for however long as it lasts—that’s the best any couple can do, age-difference or no age-difference. And this relationship doesn’t have to last until one of you drops dead for it to be regarded as a success. If you’re together for a few years and then you part ways as friends, the relationship was a success and worth the time you invested in it. The end.”
I know it’s popular to want it but fuck you for asking me for it. It’s one of the dumbest relationship related concepts, often being a passive and weaker version of an apology with added selfish and lazy factors. 9 times out of 10, you’ll regret replying to that text/email. Dicks.
Create a sick system:
More detailed ew at the link via kottke
“He was my best friend, my lover, and my mirror. When I left, I did so because I let my light go out — and because he was my mirror, there was no light left for us. Each subsequent trial of the heart has been a reminder that sometimes the one who gets away is the one who brings you closer to yourself.” -Photographer James Evans
Pictory Magazine asks a bunch of photographers about ‘The One That Got Away’..photo link via kottke
My boyfriend mused afterward that he thought the guy was nice and sweet. I shook my head and said I didn’t think so. When he asked why, I didn’t have an answer for him. I didn’t know how to begin to explain or phrase even to myself what felt so uncomfortable and racist in that interaction, without sounding hollow or oversensitive. Really, this sort of conversation about race is always difficult to begin.
More interesting internal conflicts about interracial dating at the link, via Racialicious
The collection of papers and audio tapes of a wife trapped in a horrific (though probably not uncommon) marriage to a man who went away on business often and was adamant that he have relationships with other women while she was left to take care of their four kids. She organized and labeled everything ‘Must Read After My Death’ and her grandson turned it into a documentary.
Author Terrance Dean examines the intricacies of being a black gay man in a white gay dating world. via thegang
Growing up, many black people are taught an emphasized sense of pride and self-assurance of loving oneself that their white counterparts are typically not. White men do not need validation in a world that already justifies their existence. Then again, some whites appreciate dark skin, but it seems too often that it is out of novelty or fetishism, rather than pure connection.
Obviously the same goes for women and other ethnicities but I don’t want to get started on some of the crazy shit I’ve heard, seen and experienced.
“These are some of the thoughts of a mistress, ‘but he and I love each other’, ‘but he doesn’t love his wife’. This is the mind of a cheater, they are immature.”
A few bottles of wine for two people should do it.